Gray Matter Wolf
The Culinary Conquest
"Howell that tastes awful. You cannot serve that to people...Woa Eww" Deckard looked on at his eldest brother's cooking cringing at the slop.
"People aren't here for the food baby brother. People are here for cats." Howell stared into the mother cat's eyes in an attempt to hypnotize her to stop screeching.
"Stupid fucking bladder, stupid bathroom" Deckard placed his apron back over his waist. "Howell! Get Wesley I need help"
"I told Wesley to take the summer off. I wouldn't want Wesley's ineptitude to dilute your cooking."
"Howell!" Deckard screamed at his older brother but realizing he was disturbing the customers he went back to the kitchen.
Cooking Prince entered the restaurant, noticing that there were so many customers on a Tuesday afternoon surprised him.
"Deckard's back" Howell expressed across the room trying to clear the confusion.
Cooking Prince looked on as Howell sat at cash register petting one of the cats. As Howell caught him staring he gave Cooking Prince a slight smile and returned to his mundane petting.
"So why is it that you have to stay here Cooking Prince?" Howell looked on in bewilderment trying to figure out why Deckard's college colleague had to live with them.
"Deckard needs to learn how to bake a souffle. And since I am the only one in class with any actual skill, I took it upon myself to take on the task." Cooking Prince closed his eyes in prideful conceit.
""Don't mind my brother. He is a cooking genius, it's just that he has this wall that he can't get past. Prevents him from creating his best work." Howell turned his eyes at the risotto sitting on the table. "You know you're actually kind of cute. You remind me of a rutabaga"
"As rutabaga's are not very versatile and require too much time to learn how to cook I take that as an insult, but don't worry I'm not offended." Cooking Prince took a radish out of his pocket and handed it to Howell. "There! A gift." Cooking Prince was slowly growing more and more red.
"You look a little flustered?" Howell accepted the radish and looked on trying to hold still while Cooking Prince collected himself.
"We should get coffee sometime!" Cooking Prince was beet red and his expression showed so much embarrassment Howell was taken off guard.
"...Oh...Deckard is not gonna like that..." Howell tugged at his collar to try to release the pressure.
"The coffee was very bitter" Howell said inadvertently completely unaware of what was going on.
"You're such a tease" Cooking Prince pinned Howell down trying to get him to shut up.
"That's too big." Howell expressed in a panic. "That and I don't think Deckard would think too kindly knowing that I was fooling around with his instructor."
"Is that what we're doing fooling around?" Cooking Prince laughed. "You're definitely single"
"Yes but I also don't want to start some summer fling."
In that moment Cas opened the door with a notice that she'd recieved from the company. Though she hadn't yet seen her older brother completely exposed.
"Hey Howell, I think you can shut down the cafe, looks like they're finally letting me be lead engineer...an-" Cas finally noticed that she was interrupting. "Wear protection" Cas slammed the door behind her as she left.
Howell covered his face in his hands trying to not die of embarassment.
"Im so dead. Im so dead. Im so dead. Im so dead."
"Awww." Cooking Prince removed a stray hair. "She got promoted."
"Here where are my clothes. I'm sure I have to prevent an explosion." Howell got dressed. "Would you go to your room Cooking Prince!"
"Nope. I like this room" Cooking Prince layed down on the bed and pretended to sleep.
Howell moved into the hallway and into the kitchen where Deckard stood behind the counter chopping vegetables alone.
"So you've chosen war..." Deckard began obviously pretending to be cooking something.
"Deckard I can explain"
"This guy was supposed to teach me how to bake so I don't fail my next semester, and you're fucking him."
"No! I'm not! He hit on me!"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"I'm closing the cafe."
"Howell!" Deckard eyes lit up with rage.
"Gahhh" Howell squealed and buried his face on the kitchen island. Cooking Prince came down the hallway and looked directly at Deckard.
"Hey you don't talk to Howell like that!" Cooking Prince pointed his finger directly at Deckard.
"You want to start something!?" Deckard grabbed a frying pan. Cooking Prince then proceeded to grab his own.
"You want to cook? I hope you know, that you're also a 2nd rate chef. Your tiramisu muck might actually be better than whatever your thinking to make right now."
"Today I'm going to end your tyranny for good Cooking Prince."
The whole family gathered to watch the cook off between Cooking Prince and Deckard. Toast feeling the atmosphere in the house change its attention in another direction also decided to join in the entertainment.
"Castaspella, what exactly is going on and how come everyone is gathered in the kitchen." Toast entered the kitchen making a grand entrance.
"Howell and Cooking Prince were getting intimate and Deckard is trying to prove that he doesn't need an instructor that's going to fool around with his older brother."
Howell was bawling, he felt personally responsible for the rivalry ensuing in the house.
"Little brother I'm sorry, i promise you it wasn't my fault!" Howell stammered.
"Shut up Howell! I'm emulsifying the garlic for the aioli!" Deckard yelled his hands full of kitchen utensils.
"Ha, It's gonna take you more than a garlic aioli to save you from this cookoff amateur!" Cooking Prince was mixing something in a bowl. Exactly what it was nobody in the room could explain.
Finally the two had finished plating their dishes and Cas was positioned as judge.
Cas tried both the dishes silently and rose for her decision.
"Deckard wins."
Deckard yelled out a battle cry and the whole family went wild. Although Cas still remained quiet.
"But Cooking Prince gets to stay because we're closing the cafe and you can't just take out the fact Bee isn't in town to feel lonely and attack your older brother."
"Cas! I literally won! You can't" Deckard was furious with rage and decided to go to his room. Down the hallway they all heard a slam and that was the end of that.
"Strange space outlaw as I've told you many times before, I do not want to be dominated in this fashion." Krystal stared blankly at the caped crusader in their situational roleplay.
"I know I know, but acting like you're in distress it turns me on." Space Outlaw posed in front of Krystal but she soon readied and returned to put her clothes on.
"Next time we're just having normal sex this is quite a bit much." Krystal stood in her garments completely over this Space Outlaw's taste for valiance.
Violet came running towards the two of them from the distance.
"Hey guys, we found what we were looking for we can finally leave this-..." Violet looked at Space Outlaw still proudly posing ray gun in hand eyes towards the sky.
"Oh wow that's new, with me he likes to pretend that he's a baby. The diaper, literally the whole thing."
"Violet!" Space Outlaw looked directly at her in embarassment. "You're not supposed to bring that up to anyone."
"Oh no, I play along for a bit" Violet began. "But if it starts to get too out of control that's when I stop."
Krystal fainted a stifled chuckle. "The stegosaurus native to this planet have given us their blessing to come back whenever we like for ridding them of the pesky raiders from Moon Mountain pass" Krystal and Space Outlaw then followed Violet back to the ship.
On the ship there was Bird and Bee analyzing the candy from the planet that they had just searched. Bee was different these days. Although she missed Deckard very much the anxiety of wondering about her father was lifted. So mostly these days she tried in every capacity to catch up for lost time, in little ways.